out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
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