So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
