i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
is this the sara with the beer cane?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
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