one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
