You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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