I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize