I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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