can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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