We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Randomize
