No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize