Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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