Can i not drive my cunt home
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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