and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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