you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
