So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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