I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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