So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize