According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
