dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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