I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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