please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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