She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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