He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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