just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
