I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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