last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
