also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
