Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
