I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
