Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize