Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize