She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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