thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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