And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i was born a porn star she said
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
