New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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