shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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