if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
