My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
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Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
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She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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