But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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