I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize