Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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