Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
bring money and cleavage
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Randomize
