Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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