Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Your cock deserves a montage
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
