Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
