People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
