i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
