Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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