Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize