so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
