so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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